| In Which Arielle Will Not Back Down |
[14 Feb 2009|06:15pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 determined |
] |
Well I wont back down, no I wont back down
You can stand me up at the gates of hell
But I wont back down
Gonna stand my ground, wont be turned around
And Ill keep this world from draggin me down
Gonna stand my ground and I wont back down
Hey baby, there aint no easy way out
Hey I will stand my ground
And I wont back down.
Well I know whats right, I got just one life
In a world that keeps on pushin me around
But Ill stand my ground and I wont back down
Hey baby there aint no easy way out
Hey I will stand my ground
And I wont back down
No, I wont back down
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| In Which Today is Historic |
[07 Feb 2009|12:12am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 depressed |
] |
It is strange to think that almost a fourth of my life has been spent with someone I am no longer romantically involved with.
It doesn't feel real. But I know it is. We had our last date tonight.
It was mutual, we both felt as if it had to end, but we were both very reluctant. We love eachother....but we are truely miserable with eachother to. It doesn't seem like I should be as upset as i am...but...to be honest...I am....
I wanted it to work out so badly. I wanted it so...so...so bad.
I don't really know what to say.
I miss the way it used to be.
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| In Which Arielle Feels As If She Has Been Enlightened |
[11 Aug 2008|04:48pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 indescribable |
] |
There are days in everyone's lives in which we feel like we have hit rock bottom. I feel like I am always in a state of perpetual darkness, that I am stuck in some sort of deep deep scar in the earth, which I can never climb out of.
I've been called a fatalist. I've called myself...and everything I've ever done, a failure. I've never felt satisfactory. I've always felt like I was on the loosing side of everything. I've always kept my dispair to myself, no matter how much tended to leak out from time to time and sadly stun the people around me. Fear and doubt are unending constants in my life.
It is funny how the smallest things, can at some point in your life, make so much sense. It's as if a switch has been flipped. Suddenly, I see clearly.
The only way I have failed in my life is that I've come to accept my darkness. I've come to believe that I am a failure, because I have not done the best I could in the past. I have failed because I have failed to keep trying.
I'm going to keep trying, because eventually, I will do something right. Rome was not built in a day, and I can't keep expecting my success in life, my quality of life, to be.
I'm going to keep trying. The only pain I seem to feel now, is that I didn't realize this sooner, that it took so long for me to have this wisdom sink in.
I feel like I should end this with how I feel. But I don't think I can describe the sensation...
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| In Which Arielle is ENTIRELY Done With This Bullshit |
[26 Jun 2008|07:02am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 infuriated |
] |
I've thought long and hard about what I have been meaning to say for a while, and find I really don't have any way to cushion what I'm about to say. I've waited until I was no longer in the heat of the moment, I've even tried to calm myself down the only way I can now adays, but none of that seemed to help me get any closer to finally solving the problem. I can't really say I am truely furious right now, though I can say that I'm unfathomably annoyed. I don't intend to say anything nasty, just how I feel and what I think the truth of the matter is. However, I honestly can't make any promises, and I'm beyond feeling symmpathetic or appologetic to any of you. So here it goes, in the most civil way I can possibly make it.
I want to stress...that what I am about to say doesn't apply to everyone this is directed towards, and I am not about to name people. [b]It is clear to me, that [u][i]you know who you are[/i][/u].[/b]
Probably one of my stupidest and most worthless ways of dealing with issues in my life, is to simply ignore it the best that I can. Crawl into a hole, stick my head in the ground, and hope that the issues don't find me and continue to kick at me. The thing is...they always do. I'm tired of hearing things like "You can't just stick your head in the ground, Arielle." or "You aren't doing anything about it, so you don't have the right to complain." Quite honestly, I have enough issues to deal with as it is, then to add this log to the ever growing pile. Issues, that when I try to talk about them (as none of my problems are easily solved in a night and hey...I figure "That's what friends are for!"), people are suddenly nowhere to be found. Unreachible by any means, or if they are...they are completely unavalible. It would be no one's fault, but for the fact that suddenly when the moody spell has passed...people are suddenly happy to hang out...unless I mention something, then they suddenly disappear again. Hmmm. I see a trend.
But that is not the issue I wish to address. I've gotten used to this...unfortunate situation.
No, what I really want to talk about, is what I can only image people have seen coming, because honestly...I can't see how you [b]can't[/b] see yourselves doing this. Everyone else who is not contributing to this issue, the few who have remained completely innocent (excluding Anton because the poor dear actually still seems to want your company reguardless of how you all treat the both of us), have also witnessed this behavior, and thanks to them, I've finally realized I need to stand up and say something.
[b]Stop taking advantage of Anton's good will. Stop taking advantage of the fact that the both of us roll over on our backs to our every "friend's" whim, even if it is incovient to us. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it.[/b]
Anton and I are generally happy to cater to our friends - helping them pay for things while they hang out with us because they are low on cash, inviting them to neat things whenever we can, smoking people out, and just generally giving things to them, etc. But lately, even Anton has had to admit, the two of us feel completely and entirely used.
It has become almost a daily greeting of sorts, "What are you up to? Can we swim in your pool?" or other such slight variations. No "Hey! How are you? How is your day thusfar?", No invitations anywhere else, just a seemingly harmless question...which gets asked several times a day, everyday. Sometimes it gets asked once by several different people, sometimes, and more often then not, it gets asked several times by the same person. I maybe get called once by a couple of people, but Anton gets the brunt of the calls. Why? Obviously! It's his pool. Now I'm sure some of the people who are following this, who aren't affiliated with this issue, or just...haven't gotten it yet, are probably saying something along the lines of "Why is she trippin'? They are only asking to swim!".
Only asking? When it gets to the point where people are calling more then six times a day, sometimes more, 'asking' to come use the pool in such a down to buisness manner...well, it doesn't end up being 'asking' anymore. When the only calls we EVER seem to get anymore are about a bunch of people coming over to use the pool, it doesn't end up being 'asking' anymore. When the only calls [b]I personally[/b] get are to try to find another way to contact Anton about the pool, it doesn't end up being 'asking' anymore. When Anton can't bare to say no to his friends (trust me I've definately yelled at him to say no on several occations) and instead tries to give them the hint by saying "Maybe not tonight." or "I don't think I can do it today." and we still have Anton's phone ringing off the hook about the god forsaken pool, it doesn't end up being asking anymore. When Anton finally gets up the nerve to say no to his friends and someone else calls later [b]who is at the same household hanging out with the people who asked last[/b], it REALLY doesn't end up being asking anymore. Why...if I didn't know better, it would seem like "No." wasn't the right answer, and that someone else was prodded into calling us to try to get a different one.
You know what it ends up being. I don't even have to say it.
Only ONCE. ONCE. Did Anton ever recieve a call back saying, "Oh, by the way, it is not at all expected for you to say yes, we would just like to hang out with you." Thank you.
To be honest, at first it was kinda nice. Anton and I had been thinking about using the pool now that it was getting to be summer. His pool is really very nice, and we both enjoy it a great deal when we are in it. Indeed, sometimes just being in it was enough to look over the rather annoying amount of phone calls we recieved earlier in the day. Good times were had, and we both agree this is a true statement. Until it became apparent it was less about hanging out with us, and more about using his pool.
I put up with it for a while. I believe I really tried, anyway. After all, to some extent it makes sense. Pools are nice, non-salty, and serene, and Anton's just so happens to be free of charge and readily avalible to those who don't have one. I might have been able to keep overlooking the fact that it was so obvious that people were just coming over to use it, had it not been for the fact that the times in which people wanted to go into the pool had become later and later, probably because of work, or other such things that make doing what you want to do in daylight hours impossible. It makes sense that they would want to do it later then.
But with late night activities/activities that go longer then a couple of hours during the day, what inevitably must happen is dinner. Anton and I would be very poor hosts to deny our friends and guests this, as would anyone. We have a quick fix in the shape of an outdoor grill at Anton's house, and making skewers and BBQing them is easy enough, and something that everyone seems to enjoy. It's even enjoyable to cook, and I was happy to do it, more then happy really. It gave me time to try to simmer down from how annoying everything was, and just enjoy being with the people who were around once it was all cooked. Again, good times were had for the most part.
However, the last time we had a BBQ at Anton's house...well, let's just say that it seemed more then ever that people were around for two things...and two things only, and these things were not Anton and myself. Pool and Food seemed to be the only things cared about. It was absolutely appauling the way people greeted us. Or should I say, didn't greet us. Right through the door people came through, and more people then I would like to admit simply laid down their things in the kitchen, where SOME of us were trying to cook, and with maybe a sentence or two, ran out the back door and went straight to the pool. This made me...grossly upset, but somehow I was expecting rude behavior so I just let it go as best I could and continued to prepare food for the grill. Some people who came were nice enough to help prepare things, which honestly, I can't express how greatful I was for that. Maybe my agrivation with the situation was only worsened by the fact that the day had gone...well...very shittily up until the point of the party (which would prove to make the day worse for myself) but I honestly didn't want to talk about what happened if I could help it. I didn't want to bring down the party that was forming.
So finally everything was prepared. Once or twice I was mildly annoyed again, as while we were preparing things I was already getting questions about when food was going to be done. Whatever, it's not as if the question was completely unwarnteed, but one would think that since we were just in the middle of preparing everything...the assumption would be that it was a while yet until the food would be completed. Anyway, I digress. A friend of mine was nice enough to help me bring things out to the grill, and I decided that I would grill the Veggies first, seeing as Anton is a vegaterian, and I didn't want him to be squimish about his main course being cooked over an area that had just cooked meat. Everything was going fine, a handful of people were even nice enough to drop by while I was cooking to chat briefly before re-entering the pool.
But then it turned...bad. Before I really knew what hit me, the dinner bell seemed to go off in everyone's minds before I was even half way finished cooking, and people who I didn't even remember having come over were suddenly up and about near the grill, asking when things were going to be done, why it was taking so long, what was done at the moment, why I wasn't cooking more things together. My peaceful moment of cooking suddenly turned hectic as people started walking into the rather cramped cooking space in order to get to the finished food. My friend and I kept trying to tell them to wait until everyone was around and wait for more food to be cooked before digging in, but no one truly listened. Needless to say, not everyone got to eat things that they wanted to try when they were finally finished, and I got alot of disappointed moans when I had to tell them that people had already finished the dish before they were able to get a taste.
I myself, haven't really eatten anything yet. In order to save my plate from being cleared, my friend was in charge of it's protection, and ultimately it had to be brought into the house and covered so that people werent tempted to eat it should they enter the house. I was sure at this point that most everyone was drunk and/or high, which would explain the insatiable munchies and the selective hearing about not eating the food until more was avalible. It wouldn't have been bad...but for the fact that I was neither of those things, and at this point, growing in fustration.
I was cooking as fast as I could possibly cook and be sure that the meat was indeed cooked properly. Probably the most annoying situation was the Beef one, which i ultimately had to give up to my friend due to my utter fustration and growing anxiety. People said they wanted it really raw. I gave them what they wanted. "It's not cooked. It's to raw." yada yada. Isn't that what you wanted in the first place? Whatever, put it back on the grill and made my friend do it instead, since she had more experience cooking beef anyway. Many times we batted away hands from the sause on the plate the raw meat had been on. No one seemed to care if they caught something...and honestly, I probably shouldn't have cared either. Heh.
The real kicker, was that when everything was said and done, and I finally got to finish eating, everyone was back in the pool, and me and one or two of the friends that had been helping me cook settled down to eat and converce. I eagerly finished my food, ready to put past me the unbelievable amounts of fustration I was feeling to swim and socialize with the guests that had come. Before I knew it, everyone was leaving. I really should have gone to the market sooner. I really should have started cooking before people came over. Nonetheless, it felt like a real punch in the gut. Thanks for the pool and food, we are off now! For a moment it even looked like a handful of people were about to leave without saying goodbye.
One person came up to me before leaving, saying "I'm sorry...I'm just really moody right now, and wanted to just swim it off. Thats why I didn't really talk or say hi."
I was moody as well, but I still managed to socialize ([b]and cook[/b]) with a great many people, and from the looks of it...so did you...in the pool. You just didn't socialize with me or even bother to greet me when you walked in the door. Whatever, I honestly don't want to hear your bullshit excuse.
I was so furious by the end of the day, I was ready to never have another party like that. Instead I spent the next day with someone who actually [i]wanted[/i] to hang out with me, and of course, Anton. We got calls that day to for a pool party, and we were honest about the fact that we were going to be in the pool and then watch X-Files. No one seemed interested, and I was rather glad for it.
I think the final straw, the thing that made me decide to post this, was yesterday. I was actually going to post last night, but my fury was unparalelled, so I decided not to.
In a nutshell, I went to the Diet Clinic to get weighed in and see how much weight I had lost that week on the deit I'm currently on. I was worried that I had gained, but in fact I had lost 3 more pounds. Any anger I might have felt in the past couple of days vanished, and I was telling the man who always weighs me about all the BBQ I've been having lately, and how I would love to get a BBQ sause that I could actually eat. The man, was a total sweetheart. He [b]gave[/b] me [b]two[/b] bottles of different sauses for [b]free[/b]. I was so excited, honestly someone could have killed someone in my family and I would have forgiven them in that moment. I can't explain, loosing pounds when I TOTALLY thought I gained AND getting food stuffs for free that are usually super expencive.
For better or for worse, my first thought was, "OMG WE SHOULD HAVE A BBQ TO CELEBRATE!"
Forgiving everyone for any of the annoyances from the past couple of days, I asked Anton to call a bunch of people to see if they could come over for a smaller get together.
It figures that the one day I decide to put up with more bullshit, the day that I decide to forgive everyone for all the annoying things in the past couple of days, no one wants to come. I nearly choked on the irony of the situation. Anton said they had prior plans. It sounded like a bunch of people were going out to dinner with Alice's sister, etc. It wasn't convient for them to come. I might have been able to brush it off....might have if the situation was different...
So...let me get this straight. You can't come over when it's inconvient for you, understandible, but when it's inconvient for us....what do you do? You call us until both of us feel like screaming, and finally give in.
And...may I ask....Why Anton and I weren't invited to go with you to dinner? After Anton has let you all bring yourselves and any myriad of other people to swim in his pool and smoke his weed and eat our food...you still can't find it in your hearts to call us and invite us to do things with you?
Like I said. Anton and I feel used. Completely and Utterly used. But this is the end. We aren't going to put up with your shinanigans anymore. Well maybe Anton will, he is slightly willing to forgive and forget, even if it means the continuation of being taken advantage of.
...
I can say for myself, however, that I am entirely entirely done with this situation and issue. I'm done allowing you to take advantage of me. I'm going to finally stand up for myself and say a very hardy NO to all of you.
I'm disabling comments. I will not answer to your AIMs, Emails, Texts, Calls, etc, so don't even try. I'm not in the mood to hear what you have to say on the matter, and I don't really want to hear appologies either if there are even any out there. They will all sound fake and forced to me. I don't know when I will finally be able to speak with any of you again. Honestly, I've been deeply hurt by the events of the past few days, and the way that not only I was treated, but the way Anton was treated, and will probably continue to be treated unless he wises up or unless there is some genuine remorse.
I'm glad to finally get this off my chest. Glad my friend encouraged me to. Proud that I was able to, even if I wasn't as civil as I originally planned on being and even if it was far later discussed then it should have been. I wanted to call everyone and tell them to their face, but honestly (and rather sadly)...there were to many people I would need to call...and I don't want to have to repeat the laundry list of things over and over again. This is just easier. One person will read it at least, and maybe tell the others about it.
Anyway, if I loose the majority of my friends after this, I won't care. You weren't really friends anyway if these were your true colors.
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| In Which LMU Seems to Be Getting One Step Closer |
[07 Feb 2008|01:00am] |
| [ |
mood |
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annoyed |
] |
Guh...this is a really infuriating situation.
So...a couple of months ago there was a shooting threat posted on JuicyCampus.com aimed towards LMU. They set up Police and Public Safety around the school and arrested the supposed Poster. Once the Poster had been apprehended, they then immidiately backed off with all the security.
Uh...are you fucking retarded? Yeah...the guy MIGHT have been working alone...but why wouldn't you fucking have some security around campus for at least a couple of hours after? You have NO idea if this person was working alone. Doesn't it seem smarter to stick around a LITTLE bit? No...the moment they apprehend the fucker they leave. And how did I find out about this? Did my school alert me? NO, I found out from friends.
What just happened TONIGHT?
http://media.www.laloyolan.com/media/storage/paper803/news/2008/02/07/News/Youth.Shot.After.Rivalry.Game.In.Gersten.Pavilion-3194559.shtml
That shit happened near the entrance where MY dorm is. I live literally no more then a mins walk to that gate.
HOW did I hear about this shit? From a friend of mine who claimed the shooter was actually IN the school. There were shitloads of police and helicopters and shit outside, RIGHT outside my dorm. But I thought it was because of the fact that Bill Maher was speaking at my school. I found out about this shit from MY FRIEND. I call Public Safety because I'm FREAKING THE FUCK OUT and trying to figure out what was going on because I could literally find no information ANYWHERE (I don't go to JuicyCampus.com, so I only found out later that ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) devidarkwolf had found out about something at the site) and because they hadnt issued any kind of warning or anything (and I had been in a class only like...an hour before i found out. So wouldn't they have like...gone into the class and told people to go to their dorms or something?). The line is busy for a while, probably because OTHER people were calling them freaking out about it. Finally they answered, and I said that I had heard a rather disturbing rumor, one being that there was a shooter on campus. He told me that I was misinformed, and that there had been "an emergency" and that the police were on it. He said they didn't have anything more to report.
Well only a couple of mins ago do I ACTUALLY find out what happened. Vague bastards.
I just....can't believe this shit has happened so relatively close together. And both times Public Safety has acted SOOO shadily. Like WTF? Why couldn't I have known what happened? They totally knew what was going on. Why didn't they fucking tell us, instead of just letting us all fucking panic(because i don't know why else the fucking line would be busy).
I'm still shaking. I've been trying real hard to keep cool, and I've calmed consideribly, but im really...very twitchy still. Its a really strange feeling...it really is. Feeling like...holy shit...I want to get out of here. But knowing its better not to do anything but stay still in your locked dorm. Talking to your friend online about what was going on...be offered a way out...but not wanting to put them through any risk. I wouldn't have wanted someone to come to a school with a possible shooter in it! Even if it was to get me out of a really scary situation. Believe me...I wanted to scream and ask Anton to come get me after all (he had been heading my way when i found out), or to say yes to Elise, but who the fuck would put their friends through a risk like that.
Guh....All this panic...I seriously couldn't have been the only one knowing and being this paniced about this rumor.
Why didn't they just fucking tell us what was going on?
Whatever...this school fucking sucks.
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| In Which Life is....? |
[24 Jan 2008|03:07pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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morose |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
"Ghost Love Score" Nightwish |
] |
So...Heath Ledger died....and now I'm getting my snakes Ashes today....
Can life be filled with something other then death right now for me? No...that's never how it works.
Life is great
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| In Which Arielle Shares Her Beliefs |
[07 Aug 2007|08:28am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 contemplative |
] |
| [ |
music |
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None |
] |
The top score on the list below represents the faith that Belief-O-Matic, in its less than infinite wisdom, thinks most closely matches your beliefs. However, even a score of 100% does not mean that your views are all shared by this faith, or vice versa.
Belief-O-Matic then lists another 26 faiths in order of how much they have in common with your professed beliefs. The higher a faith appears on this list, the more closely it aligns with your thinking.
1. Unitarian Universalism (100%)
2. Secular Humanism (92%)
3. Liberal Quakers (88%)
4. Neo-Pagan (85%)
5. Theravada Buddhism (85%)
6. Mahayana Buddhism (77%)
7. Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants (76%)
8. New Age (72%)
9. Taoism (67%)
10. Nontheist (61%)
11. Jainism (60%)
12. Sikhism (59%)
13. Reform Judaism (55%)
14. Orthodox Quaker (53%)
15. Hinduism (50%)
16. Scientology (43%)
17. Bahá'í Faith (39%)
18. New Thought (38%)
19. Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (33%)
20. Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (32%)
21. Seventh Day Adventist (27%)
22. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (25%)
23. Orthodox Judaism (25%)
24. Islam (22%)
25. Jehovah's Witness (18%)
26. Eastern Orthodox (18%)
27. Roman Catholic (18%)
At first I was skeptical about their 100% choice for me: Unitarian Universalism. But coupled with beliefs from Secular Humanism (aka Atheism) I'd say it's not to off the mark >.>. It kinda sounds like an 'Anything Goes' religion/belief...which I would say is very inkeeping with my personality...so it makes sence in the end even if its sorta "Some believe that god is real...and some believe the opposite". I suppose it also depends on the situation that you call your beliefs upon to....sometimes you NEED a god...or a belief in something even when you know in your deepest thoughts that there isn't one. I don't know if that makes any sence...
LMAO QUAKER. I think that may only coinside with their believe of "Why is there evil in the world?" They focus not on why...but how can we get rid of it...which is something that I also respect...we shouldn't ask ourselves..."Oh why is this happening to me..." or "Why must I suffer?" but do something about it....asking WHY isn't going to get anything accomplished or make your life better >.>;
Anyway...this was the site's explination on what Unitarian Universalism is >.> If you are at all curious...like i said...its a pretty flakey belief system XD...but coupled with Secular Humanism...I think its not to far from what I believe.
http://www.beliefnet.com/story/80/story_8041_1.html
---
On a completely different note...OMG PLZ READ HP7 so i can cry soon ;o;...I'm afraid to post anything for fear of spoiling people ;o;
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| In Which Arielle Wants To Rip Her Teeth Out Herself |
[22 Jul 2007|12:31pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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morose |
] |
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
I just realized that I can't go to Comic Con because I will be getting my wisdom teeth taken out *CRIES*
AND LOOK WHAT I JUST FOUND
http://avatarspirit.net/index.php#434
*CRIESSOHARDITSPRETTYREDICULOUS*
WHY???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
I HATE YOU TEEF I HATE YOU.
To understand that calibur of my disappointment.....this is like...if the CW network personally called up devidarkwolf and told her that they wouldn't be able to let her into the SPN Panel...for private reasons...or something....WHATEVER YOU GET THE MESSAGE.
OMG WHY...my life is so ruined.....WHY WHY WHY....
-----
On another completely different note....I'm reading HP7....
If you Call me, PM me, Post in my forums/lj, Email me, or AIM me with ANY spoilers....I swear to god. Your life will turn into a rageing torrent of dispair and misery. THIS I SWEAR TO YOU.
-----
*goes away to cry and read hp*
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| In Which Anton Was Shown "Watership Down" |
[14 Jul 2007|10:44am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 amused |
] |
| [ |
music |
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"Where Have All The Good Times Gone" David Bowie |
] |
"Hrudodo?"
"Yeah, that's their word for car."
"This movie is insane..."
XD Oh Anton and your hilarious. I thought Anton was going to hate it >.>;, but I made him watch it anyway. He cried when Violet died...and was moaning in saddy when Bigwig got snared. He was suprised how violent the movie was XD;. I suppose I led him to believe it wasn't that violent though...I told him I used to watch it all the time when I was little. I suppose he still doesn't realize what a morbid child I was XD;. And of course...can anyone guess who his favorite character is? Of course it's fucking Bigwig XD. I knew Anton would like him...he's just kinda one of those characters that you know he's gonna like. He's bad ass...and he gets shit done, two things that Anton really appreciates in characters. Oi, Anton's predicibility is a little rediculous XD;.
Blackavar is such love. To bad he's kinda pussyish....and dead. I don't really have a favorite character in Watership Down, despite the many times that I have watched it. It's always skipped around, though my love for Blackavar has remained pretty consistant...In fact...the ripped ear gene in feoraptors? Came from Blackavar XD;. I thought his ears were so cute ;o;...even if they were all ripped. But I suppose I can't label him as my favorite character....since...I dont know...I just can't XD;. But I suppose he's the closest thing.
Oi....I really need to see plague dogs now >.>; like...bad style. OMG KANAI SEND ME LINKYS AGAIN ;o;!!!!!!
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| In Which Arielle's New Adoption Does Well |
[02 Jul 2007|12:32pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 artistic |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Silence |
] |
Equilibrium is doing great! We have 10 official members, and more people signing up to check the place out! There is currently Round 2 of commissions going on, as Round 1 is almost complete and there are two more slots avalible. If you are a member and interested in taking up a slot, I urge you to run over now XD. If your curious, just look at the last journal entry before this for the link to the board to look around!
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| In Which Arielle Has A New Adoption |
[24 Jun 2007|11:48pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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artistic |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Silence |
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Hey guys! I have a new adoption, and I wanted to let all of you who know me and like my stuff know about it. It is a commission only adoptible called Pondera. They are miniture elemental raptor creatures whose elements are dictated by what genes they inherit from their parents. You get a free one just for joining! This is so that people who don't have the cash to burn can still gain one and join in the festivities of the community. There are currently 3 commission slots open for people who are interested in possibly gaining more then one. Hope to see you there!
http://ponderaptor.proboards74.com/index.cgi
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| In Which Arielle Steals a Meme From myrror |
[19 May 2007|12:13pm] |
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mood |
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depressed |
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music |
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Various iTunes Songs |
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Rules
1. Open your mp3 player of choice and set it to random.
2. Share your favorite lyrics that do not include the title from the next 25 songs that come on. [Skip instrumentals and foreign-language songs for the purpose of the meme.]
3. Let your friends to guess the song and artist. [NO CHEATING by Google or other means.]
Lyrics
[1] I hope I'll understand some day, What's the meaning of this crazy game?
[2] A lifetime is so short, A new one can't be bought, And what you've got means such a lot to me.
[3] And love, love, love, Is a dangerous drug, You have to recieve it, And you still can't, Get enough of the stuff.
[4] Hello? Hello? Is anyone there?
[5] Snakes and mice get wrapped up so nice, With spider legs and pretty bows. - wildglitterwolf, "Making Christmas" tNBC Soundtrack.
[6] GI Joe was an action man, Shaggy drove the mystery van, Devo was my favorite band, Take me back to my happy land.
[7] And will we ever end up together? No, I think not, it's never to become, For I am not the one.
[8] Loneliness, I feel loneliness in my room.
[9] But the light gave me some kind of fright.
[10] Who can say if I've been changed for the better? But, because I knew you [No one mourns the Wicked] Because I knew you, I have been changed.
[11] I think I'm going blind, Just like Mr. Magoo.
[12] [See my baby soon] Gonna have fun in the city [feel like f***ing you], [Do my baby] Be with my girl, she's so pretty [All I want to do]
[13] I got sunshine, I got you. There's nothing, nothing life can do.
[14] Your face it haunts, my once pleasent dreams. Your voice it chased away, all the sanity in me. - random_amsy, "My Immortal" Evanescence.
[15] Just when you think you're in control, just when you think you've got a hold, just when you get on a roll...
[16] Gravity on me, never let me down, gently.
[17] Life's more painless, for the brainless.
[18] In my dreams I'm dying all the time, Then I wake it's kaleidoscopic.
[19] In my field of paper flowers, and candied clouds of multiply, I lye inside myself for hours, and watch my purple skys fly over me. - random_amsy, "Imaginary" Evanescence.
[20] Don't wish, don't start. Wishing only wounds the heart.
[21] I am tired, I am weary. I could sleep for a thousand years. A thousand dreams that would awake me, different colors made of tears.
[22] It's just the wasted years so close behind. Watch out, the world's behind you!
[23] 'Cause we're the all time winners, in the all time loser's game.
[24] In the eye of the storm, you'll see a lonely dove.
[25] Knows not where he's going to. Isn't he a bit like you and me?
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| In Which Arielle Finds Life to be Difficult Right Now |
[16 May 2007|08:51am] |
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mood |
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melancholy |
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music |
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Silence |
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I haven't written anything in a while, I suppose I should. But there is nothing all that great to report. I got out of school, and I still need to register for classes for the next semester because im dumb and haven't done that yet. Have moved back into my house, but I'm avoiding it as much as possible, as being at my house for long periods of time seems to be detrimental to my mood, especially when my parents are around. All they want to talk about is school...and what I'm doing next. Now that your out of school, you should do *lists myriad of things that sound really unappealing but which eventually they will make me do at least one of them*. Because as long as I live under the roof of my parents...with help from their money...etc...I am basically their doll to do whatever they want with. Luckily they haven't forced me to do anything yet...but I can't help but feel like thats going to change today. Mom wants to have a 'talk'.
I'm going to be trying to do commissions and such however. I want to start making money. I need to start making money. I am also going to try again with my driver's licence soon. I need to drive so i can get my own place...and a job. I have a friend who I'm worried about. I can't really talk much about it, but I need to have a place to stay...so she can come there if she needs to. My parents wouldn't allow her at my house...because the last time i had a friend over similar to her...they called him an axe murderer and threw him out...he had to live with me and anton for the time he was visiting...which wasn't cool. Not that we minded having him 'not cool'...but the fact that my parents threw him out of the house (not before interigating him btw) 'not cool'.
Buh...it's all a jumble...its all hard to deal with...and I don't even really want to talk about it. There doesn't seem to be a point. Ranting about it isn't going to make it go away. I just wish life could let up a little.
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| In Which Arielle Is Excited |
[25 Apr 2007|07:35pm] |
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mood |
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excited |
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music |
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Golden Compass Music? |
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OMG A GOLDEN COMPASS MOVIE??????????
Anyway...check out Tarquin. He's hot stuff. If you could evaluate my self assesment that would be cool...since i want to know if my daemon would actually be a wolf or not XD
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